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Goddammit, Obama.

   While some on the Left have relentlessly criticized Obama for not immediately shooting free marijuana out of his armpits and ending both wars with a click of his Birkenstocks as soon as he took...

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Oh, Shut. Up. Bristol Palin.

So during VH1's Divas Salute The Troops special, Kathy Griffin made a crack about Bristol Palin being fat because, well, let's face it, she is a bit on the chunky side. Whatever, harmless joke right?...

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GET AWAY FROM HIM, YOU BITCH!

An Aliens reference? Anyone? Anyone? Nope? Okay then. Anyway, Ryan Reynolds and Sandra Bullock were spotted ringing in the new year together in Austin, Texas together, and based on the Law of TMZ, they...

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So Remember When Miley Cyrus’ Back Was Treated Like a Terrorist Attack?

   This should go over well. ADVISOR: Mr. President. That day we planned for? It’s here. OBAMA: Miley Cyrus side-boob? ADVISOR: Miley Cyrus side-boob. OBAMA: Goddammit. Have the King James and a pistol...

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Hugh Hefner apparently hates money!

Because let’s face it, at this point Hugh Hefner is so goddamn close to death he can teabag the grim reaper, The Hef apparently decided to marry Crystal Harris without a prenup despite the fact that...

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The Crap We Missed – Monday 5.9.11

   “Is that a Chris Brown post down there? Goddammit…” Welcome to the Monday Crap We Missed where we take a full weekend in Hollywood antics and turn it into a highlight reel of smurf-boner deflators,...

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Leonardo DiCaprio’s Banging Blake Lively

   UPDATE: Now with photos of them together this morning, so I can’t assume this is bullshit like 99% of what I write about. Goddammit. At this point it’d just be easier to make a list of who Leonardo...

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Gwyneth Paltrow & Ryan Murphy Are Making a Musical. Just.. Goddammit

   If you made a list of people who every time they speak you want to shove a rabid tiger down your urethra, Gwyneth Paltrow and Ryan Murphy would be at the top of that list. So, of course, high off...

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Alright, Who Skinned Superman And Turned Him Into Jeans?

   Goddammit, Khloe. Earth’s yellow sun was supposed to make him fly, not contain your ass. Just.. sonofabitch. Adding… This photo will be hilarious to anyone who’s 11 (i.e. me). Photos: INFdaily The...

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The Crap We Missed – Friday 11.18.11

Welcome to Friday’s The Crap We Missed featuring Reese Witherspoon trying to intimidate me into thinking she wasn’t pregnant all those times I said she was (NEVER.), Anna Paquin on a boat, the carrot...

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Chris Brown Tweets Support For Trayvon Martin. Oh, Goddammit…

Spike Lee being a fucking idiot aside, things were starting to turn around in the Trayvon Martin case. ABC News obtained footage that showed a clearly non-injured George Zimmerman despite conveniently...

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And Welcome To The Exact Moment Johnny Depp Told Native Americans To Eat A Dick

There’s no way we don’t have to give them an entire state now. Just.. goddammit, Johnny Depp. Photo: PeopleRead More ... The post And Welcome To The Exact Moment Johnny Depp Told Native Americans To...

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Bristol Palin Received Death Threats After Obama, Gay Marriage Post. Goddammit…

Probably the worst thing that could’ve happened after Bristol Palin(‘s ghost writer) wrote a hilariously hypocritical blog post criticizing Barack Obama‘s support for gay marriage is an excuse for her...

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Republicans Are Making It Look Like Alec Baldwin Attacks The Paparazzi. Oh,...

“Now, remember, make me look like a good dad in front of these scum, you thoughtless little p- *gets closer to paparazzi* Gosh, honey, I sure do love these walks we take every day. Together. In the...

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Good Morning, Minka Kelly’s Butt, And Other News

- Girl, stoned out of her mind, decides to climb the electricity pylon. - Jon Hamm is strangely monogamous. Goddammit… - America Straight Up Lies About Nickelback Hatred - Hugh Jackman‘s hairy nipples...

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Scarlett Johansson In A Bikini Has A New Boyfriend

“Wait, why did you just smile like that and give a thumbs up- Aw, goddammit.” Here’s Scarlett Johansson in Italy today where you’ll notice she’s with a different boyfriend than the one she was with in...

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Joe Paterno’s Wins Vacated From The Record Books, Statue Pulled Down

“I survived the Batman shooting for this? Goddammit, dad…” After the Freeh Report hit, even the most die-hard of Joe Paterno fans remained quiet in light of damning evidence that showed he not only...

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Dane Cook Joked About The Colorado Shooting. Goddammit…

If you thought anyone learned a thing from the Daniel Tosh and Tracy Morgan incidents, clearly you’ve underestimated the media’s reluctance to let go of these taken completely out of context comedy...

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Rihanna To Oprah: ‘Chris Brown Is The Love Of My Life,’ Just… Goddammit

Chris Brown almost brutally killed Rihanna and left her for dead after she looked at his phone and caught him cheating with another woman (or man), so of course, this is the person she just described...

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